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daily snapple fact #27
A ball of glass will bounce higher then a ball of rubber.

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doug at freewayslowdance.com

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eaaaalll.

so i sat down to watch an episode of "Trading Spaces" when all of a sudden, from outside the house, i hear this sound "eeaaall! eeeaaall!" and i think "what the hell is that? somebody turn that shit off." "eeeaall!" it screamed again, like a raccoon in heat. "eaaalp!" eaaalp? what does that mean? "somebody. please. eaaalp." HELP. somebody's screaming for help. i rush outside (pausing momentarily to ponder whether i ought to put on shoes or not) when there, in front of me, is a toppled old lady and walker. her little dog ran about her in circles, then took off down the street. "oh thank you" she said, saliva dripping down her chin. "do you need me to call the paramedics?" i ask. "no" she replies, "just get my dog." and i get sean to rush off down the street to get her dog while i see if she's okay.

"is there anyone i can call?" "no. i don't have anyone." she said, as a neighborhood boy rode by on his bicycle.

her feet are spotted blue. i'm not sure why, but i think this is something that happens when you get old. she cries about her knees hurting so badly. I right her walker, pick her up, and she hobbles, leash in hand, back up the walkway in her house and closes the door.

on the contrasting side, brian kischell, a kid from my class in high school was shot in the head Sunday and killed. he was 20 years old. the shooting was an accident, and he was allegedly killed by his best friend, louis riley. i wonder if he's the first from my class to die.

posted by Doug 11:32 PM

millionaire ends on happy note!

okay, i know i just posted, but i just found out that joe millionaire ended on a happily-ever-after. how happy that makes me. fucking manic of me, but i'm pretty stoked. congrats joe & zora!

posted by Doug 12:08 AM

Dropping Classes

I just dropped a class. And now I'm left with this terrible feeling of inadequacy, like I've just admitted that I'm not good enough, not smart enough, to cut it. It wasn't even particularly hard or uninteresting. But at 11:20 with 40 minutes left on the drop deadline, and me having to work at 5:30 am tomorrow, i'm just tired. i don't want to have to think about the midterm on Thursday, and i thought this would be relief.

but instead it just sort of feels ... empty.

what a terrible feeling. admitting that you as a person are not capable of doing something.

posted by Doug 11:42 PM

"Are You Hot"

I'm disappointed. No, I mean I really am. Take a look at the finalists, guys. Then decide for yourselves. What bizarre benchmark are they measuring these people on? The finalists are all so bland. I mean, yeah, they all look terrific, but in this sort of muted exchange of interesting features for Sears-Catalog hotness.

Now, take a look at Hot Zone 2: The SouthEast's contestants. I bet the oddly interesting looking ones, Constantine, Kris, Troy, Chantille, end up getting passed up for the likes of the more standard Valerie (who, granted, is still genetically perfect.) But where's that movie-star, smoldering kind of weird-hot? The kind where, when you see them without all that make-up and lighting on at some low-level premiere they look sort of frumped out and different? I'm talking Amy Smart, hot. Renee Zellweger, George Clooney, Matt Damon. People that have that interesting sort of "Why the hell do I think they're hot?" look. People I can distinguish from one another.

Fuck this perfection "Are You Hot" is feeding us. I don't care if somewhere between your hips and thighs, your legs don't touch, or if they touch the entire length. The idea of a standardized "Hot" aesthetic is bullshit.

posted by Doug 10:33 AM

i will not be another jesse valor.

I was listening in the coffee shop to this guy hack out his songs, trying to get the unimpressed crowd to listen and lucky to be getting a sparse amalgam of something resembling applause. and i realized that his songs lack exactly the same thing my songs do (actually, and most shitty amature musicians playing in coffee shops for no pay): lyrical/musical cohesion, and structural variation. And it makes me sad. Because the more i listen to music, the more i realize how far and away i am from any sort of decent pop-rock song. How many of these lone crooners are there out in the world? Each wondering why they aren't successful? Wondering why people don't share the same fervor for their own songs that they have for themselves. Wondering why they aren't loved and adored for their talent. It's simple, really. You don't have talent.

If you want to play, play for yourself, play for self-interest.
And if you want to share, make sure you have something to share first.

thanks, jesse.

postponing my coffee shop debut until i've written something half-way decent.

posted by Doug 12:54 AM

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